.//estherofcain//.

S A R A N G H A E.

2009-03-25T20:40:00.000-07:00

I love you.

Why are those words never enough?

Why must a person further prove their love and devotion to another by doing ridiculous things?

Why.

Because as humans, we like reassurance, and constantly ask for it.

To me, it's ridiculous but at the same time understandable. I feel that once someone says those words with every fiber of their being, they actually really and truly mean it.

I admit, I want to be reassured, I want to know that those words will hold true not only today, the next week, but as long as we are together.

These special words should not be used sparingly nor in excess but enough so that your partner knows you hold true to your words.

Nowadays, I look around, and can't help but wonder....what the hell is wrong with kids today? Do they really think they understand the true meaning of love? Do they understand the type of commitment they get into when they say those words?

The answer: No, they don't.

The problem with not just kids but many couples today is that...they don't understand love means to not only cherish another person and be happy but to stay with them through thick and thin.

In a way, it's almost like marriage, except with lesser consequences.

You may think I'm being completely hypocritical, seeing as I'm a child no more than 16 1/2 years old but is what I say not true?

When I look around, I feel like we have lost the true meaning of love. Love has turned into a word that helps a person get into anothers' pants, if not otherwise.

P.S.
I love you

Simplicity of L I F E.

2009-03-18T18:35:00.001-07:00

Why does life have to be so complicated?

I feel like humans just like shove themselves in deep shit and like the whining about it.

I am the type of person who will listen to your problems whether your be friend or foe. I like to be there and help a person, because in reality we all need someone. The thing I hate the most is when someone tries to take advantage of my willingness to help in order to gain attention. Sometimes I'll play along and give them what they want, but others its just too much.

But how can you distinguish when someone is being serious? How do you know when someone is taking advantage of you? What if the one time you deny someone your willingness to listen, it's the one time the actually need it? ....that's just it....What if?

Recently, a person I haven't talked to for a while started texting me again as if everything was normal. He broke things off with me and said he didn't want to talk...and just a few days ago picked things back up again like nothing happened. No questions asked, I was okay with it and I decided to go with the flow...why bother making things complicated?

We were talking for a bit...and it just so happened he only started talking to me after noticing my relationship status changing on Facebook (go figure). He wanted to know who and why I'm with this guy....overstepping boundaries he shouldn't have even tried to step over. I ignored it and said "Doesn't concern you, don't worry about it." He was like okay...

He stopped texting me for two days. Once again, you notice he fails at handling negativity he tends to just turn away from the problem until its okay to look back again.

He texted me once again last night.

He was having a few problems...and I was willing to listen.

Apparently, he had gotten a C on his term card and when his father found out..he was already drunk...Not exactly a good combination. His father beat the shit out of him and disowned the kid..His parents are divorced, hasn't seen his mom in 8 years, and is now residing at a friend's house...He was feeling down and he knew he could come to me about his problems. I didn't want him to feel pressured about anything so I asked him what was on his mind, how he wanted to handle things, and gave him my advice.

He starting thinking about death. I've already been down this road, so I already knew how to approach it...But after saying "Idk...I really want to try it even though I am scared" He stopped replying to my texts...at this point I didn't feel burdened like most people would...I continued to try to talk to him even though he wasn't replying...hoping that he would realize that people still care..

All of a sudden, I get a text from the friend he was staying at who said "Hey this is ------ he's not feeling welll right now"....I replied "...yo this isn't funny, tell me wtf is really going on.."

His friend switches back the phone to HIM and he says.."I'm baking."

At this point, I'm like, "Wow. You have got to be kidding me."

Ugh...We'll see what happens...

The World is Flat.

2009-03-16T17:48:00.001-07:00

What has the world come to nowadays?

People have become so ignorant, whining about insignificant problems as if their life depended on it.

Don't people realize the atrocities around the world?

Everyday, children dying because they have no food or are kidnapped and made in to child soldiers.

Still want to whine?

What about the children who live in the slums, sometimes kidnapped and have their eyes spooned out so they can become blind singers on the streets?

I sometimes wonder, why people say they care and don't do anything about it.

Why say it in the first place?

Sure, you care for the first few seconds that you are impacted with grueling images of these kids...but in the end you go back to your daily lifestyle without a care in the world. Go on with life as it was.

&& Go on whining about how awful your life really is.

Sometimes I just wanna say SUCK IT UP & get over it. Stop being narcissistic and try helping out someone else for a change.